Sunday, February 14, 2010

Nordique Combined Humiliated

Brian Schwartz's Nordique Combined squad was left reeling Sunday after their namesake team failed to get even a single medal in the first of three Nordic Combined events at the Games.

Ellis Kunka was the beneficiary as his Cornballers picked up a big 16.7 point gold medal courtesy of France's Jason Chappuis. Brittany B.'s Buck-Toothed Rabbit Bitches got the 8.3 point silver medal, as B.'s upset record continued with Team USA's first ever medal in the sport.

"I was expecting two medals on a bad day," said a (now much less overconfident) Schwartz - who had been incredibly pleased with his Norway nordic pick. "The sport is not called French Combined and frankly I don't even want to think about what that sport would be."
Also picking up golds were a couple of other much-maligned squads, Zach Chromiak's Banker's Club (France Biathlon) and Tim Lavoie's Fightin' Ovechkins (Czech Speed Skating). Dave Spence got on the board with 2.1 points thanks to a bronze for Canadian speed skating.

Overall the afternoon was a disaster for Nordique Combined. The squad could be out of the running early if their German Luge team can't get at least gold and silver during the final round of men's singles, going on right now.

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